I keep losing my erection. Can I help this without drugs?

Dear Suffering Stiffy,

This can be a very common experience. Studies show that about 11% of men have erectile disorder. But, just because your penis doesn’t always work the way you’d like it to does not mean that you have a sexual problem. In fact, depending on your age, this could be part of normal sexual functioning for you.

Many men lose their erections during sexual activity. The brain is actually your primary sex organ so when your brain is off somewhere else or you’re worrying about something your arousal level will decrease and you will easily lose your erection. This is perfectly normal. Although, pharmaceutical companies would love you to take drugs to solve your erectile problems, this is usually not necessary.

The blood quickly drains from a man’s penis for a number of reasons, but most likely when they’re concerned about their penis (is it big enough? too big? what if I cum?, or worse, what if I can’t cum, etc.). Try to relax during sex, enjoy the sensations, and don’t let your brain take over.

You could also use a cock ring, which traps blood inside the penis and helps men maintain erections for longer periods of time. Cock rings are made of many different materials, come in numerous shapes and sizes, and even have vibrating bullets attached to them for her pleasure. Just make sure never to wear a cock ring for more than 30 minutes.

Another thing you should try doing is called Kegel exercises. Yes men should be doing these too. Guys should be doing Kegel exercises to strengthen the PC (pubococcygeus) muscle involved in orgasm. Kegels give guys harder erections, better orgasm control, and reduce the chance of incontinence later on in life.

So guys, the next time you’re taking a pee stop the flow midway. The PC muscle (which you clinch to stop the flow of urination) is the same one you clinch to do Kegel exercises. Once you figure this out, you should do Kegels daily just like you workout your biceps. Do a set of 30 every time you brush your teeth.

Kegel exercises will most likely help your problem. A British study of men who had erectile difficulties found that 76% of the men were completely cured by doing regular Kegel exercises and by changing their diet and exercise routines.

If none of this helps and it continues to be a problem in your life, please consult with your family doctor or a sex therapist. You may want to try one of the erectile drugs like Viagra, Cialis, or Levitra.

Best regards,

Dr. Brian Parker