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How Can I Stop My Boyfriend Watching Porno Without Me?My boyfriend and I basically live together and we have an outstanding sex life. In fact, it's the best I've ever had. But one thing that bothers me is when he looks at porno without me. I like watching it together, but I don't like it when he does it without me. We go to work at different times, so I know he does it when I leave. I have even looked through my computer so I know when he does it and what he's looking at. I've said something to him about it, but he tells me that he isn't attracted to me less or anything and I'm not being replaced. I feel like I should be his #1 priority when it comes to sex and I don't feel like I am. How can I get him to stop?
- Carolina B., Oakland, CA You want him to stop? I think you need to understand some things. First, people are different, especially sexually. Just because you might handle something one way doesn't mean everyone else will handle it that same way. Secondly, as humans, we have many sexual outlets, all of which are personal to us. Let him enjoy his, whatever they may be, and you enjoy yours. You just can't (and shouldn't) control your boyfriend's sexuality - it's his own, and he can masturbate to whatever he wants as much as he wants. And frankly, his alone time is none of your business. The same goes for you; you have the same rights and if he tried to interfere with those, it would be a problem then too. So what it comes down to is if it's truly a threat to you or not. You say that you want to be his #1 priority when it comes to sex, and it sounds to me like that is indeed the case. You mentioned that you have an outstanding sex life, so it doesn't appear that you're being neglected or that you two don't take care of each other in a sexual way.
Be secure in your relationship. And stop snooping. Write me when your issue is "My sex life is really suffering because of my boyfriend's preference of pornography over me." Until then, enjoy how great you seem to have it. You're complaining about the best sex you've ever had! This article was published on Saturday 23 October, 2010. |
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