What is the strangest fetish you've heard of?

Dear Happily ‘Normal’,

Yes, I’ve been fortunate (or unfortunate) to have worked with and studied people who get off on a number of different things. I thought I’d compile a list of the top ten strangest fetishes I’ve heard of so all you people out there who think you’re super kinky can have a new perspective on how sexually whacked some people are.

For those of you not in the sexual know, a fetish is an obssessive preoccupation with an inanimate object such as a high heel shoe or a non-sexual body part that elicits sexual arousal and may become necessary for sexual gratification.

You’re right Happily ‘Normal,’ some people are into some pretty strange crap, quite literally. Starting off the list is Scat or Coprophilia. These are people who love to poop or be pooped on for sexual reasons.

My ninth strangest fetish is people who call themselves Furries or Furverts. Furverts get off on life-sized cartoon mascots. They either enjoy wearing the costume or having sex with the mascot. So Happily ‘Normal,’ if you don’t get a boner over your local sport team's mascot you probably aren’t into this.

Coming in at number eight is Body Inflation. People into this fetish wear body inflation suits, which are generally made of rubber to get their groove on. Following closely behind is Fat Admirers. This fetish is pretty self-explanatory. They are usually referred to as chubby chasers, feeders, or gainers.

Though most people might think this is pretty sick, I’ve put Testicle / Breast Torture in sixth place. This fetish involves torturing the goods with sledgehammers, electro-shock, and the like. Coming in halfway is what is referred to as a Robot Fetish. Here, individuals use either robot dolls or costumes resembling aliens for an out of this world sexual experience.

Medical Procedures Fetishes comes in fourth spot. These people enjoy things like being put under with aenethesia or being catheterized during sex. The third wackiest fetish, in my opinion, is called Messies. Individuals in this category love to get down and dirty with vomit, mud, pee, and pretty well anything stinky and messy.

Coming in at number two is a Balloon Fetish. This kink involves sexual arousal and gratification from balloons due to the material and/or inflation.

Now all these might seem pretty out there Happily ‘Normal,’ but none compete with the fetish I’ve put in number one. Bug Chasers are individuals who seek out HIV positive individuals and have unprotected sex with them for the sole purpose of becoming infected.

As you can see Happily ‘Normal,’ there are lots of people into many different kinks. It’s best not to judge others on their sexual choices. If they don’t hurt anyone, they are doing no harm.

Best regards,

Dr. Brian Parker