Which Online Dating That Is Open With Chocolate Fetishes?

There isn't an online dating service that I'm aware of that has questions concerning sexual personalities to the depth you're talking about here. Craigslist is probably your best bet, though you won't be exposed to the sheer numbers of the main dating services.

Your question got me thinking, John. Just how much about our sexual selves to online dating services try to uncover?

The answer is next to none. I went on one of the main matchmaking sites that I won't name here (I'll give you a hint, though: it sounds a lot like “e-Harmony”) to see exactly what they felt the key was to matching you up with someone you were perfect for. Excluding the few that were asking how important being physically attracted to the opposite sex is, there were two, sexually speaking, that had to do with matching you up with a partner. That's two out of over three hundred. Less than 2/3 of 1%. So if someone had a dollar and was offering you that same amount, they'd take one penny, cut off over a third of it and give the remainder to you. That would be economically worthless, just like a relationship that is physically based on the same amount would be.

According to that site, over 99% of a relationship is something other than your sexual compatibility. One of the two sexual aspects they actually bother to include is rating how important “sexual compatibility” was to you. Talk about a general, sweeping question! That shouldn't be a choice to rate; it should be an entire section of 300-and-something questions of its own.

Sure, there are other factors in a relationship than your sex life and you might think that I'm oblivious to them since I write primarily about sexual issues. However, I agree completely with this article about how there is a balance between our physical and mental components in a relationship. Surely that balance includes more physical matters than barely over half a percent of the relationship! I'm sure that anyone in sexual counseling could tell you that when the sexual area is out of balance, the magnitude of the situation is going to be much, much greater than .66%.

This gem actually shows up on the list: “I sometimes drive faster than the posted speed-limit.” You're telling me that is more important than something like, “I feel inadequate when I'm rejected by my partner”?

I guess they just expect that you'll pair up based upon all the other items on their list and then cross your fingers on the physical aspect of it all. That sounds to me like a recipe for e-Cacophony.