Why Are Guys Treating Me Just Like A Sexual Object?

Guys aren't like that. Those guys are like that. Some guys see girls as little trophies and don't value what a woman is or what a woman can make a man. Keep looking.

I have heard the "I hate being treated like a sexual object" thing from many women, though. This is a tough statement. We definitely want to be thought of as a sexual object in some fashion, don't we?

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that it's wrong to see a person as an object. We're supposed to see them as a whole person with many facets to them and much to offer, not just as someone who has a stunning face, great breasts, or shoulders that you can't take your eyes off.

The problem is, objectification is very important, despite the negative feeling we get when we hear the word. When someone initially is attractive to you or arouses sexual feelings in you, you are approving and validating something about them. You may not know anything about that other person except for the fact that you like what you initially see. That person - more specifically, the way they look - is a stimulus, and in that sense, they are an object.

That is essential. Attraction can only work if we recognize someone as being separate and beyond ourselves. They are there and I am here. She is her and I am me. He is him and I am me.

So this is all a good thing. And we bring it upon ourselves. How many billions of dollars are spent each year trying to make people more attractive sexual objects? How many hours are spent for the same reason? You might go to the gym for some health reasons, but you don't get your hair highlighted, nails done, or buy that cute top to do anything but make yourself more attractive. Part of it is being part of society's norm as far as following what's popular in looks and style, but not all of it. We all try to look our best. Have you ever thought of why? Most people will say that they're doing it for themselves. That's true, but it's for them because underneath that, it's for everybody else. I haven't ever met someone who would highlight their hair if they lived on a desert island.

Both women and men desire chances to be seen as sexual objects, and many complain how they don't get a chance to feel that way enough.

I think the true issue is when you have to say, "I hate being treated only like a sexual object." But when someone meets you and lets you know you're attractive, I don't see that as a huge problem. After all, they haven't gotten a chance to know that you're smart, funny, motivated, and the like. If, after dating a while, the only compliment you ever get is how cute you are, then that's incomplete. Move on if that's the case.