Is It Wrong That We Married So Young?

If we could invent a machine where we could visit ourselves at different points in our lives and ask ourselves who we were at that point in time, we'd get a different answer every time. You're not who you were at 18 when you're 25, you're not who were at 25 when you're 33, and sometimes after something major, you're not even who you were at 35 who you are at 36. Life is a strange combination of growth and changes while simultaneously settling into who you will be. When you enter into a long-term relationship, especially a marriage, you're committing that you'll grow with them. What you can't foresee is whether or not you'll grow in the same direction. It sounds to me like you didn't here, and unfortunately that happens more than we hope it might.

I'm sure that you feel helpless in not only what's going on in the grand scheme of things, but also feel helpless every time a difference comes up between you. It's not that either of you are doing anything wrong; it's just that you're going down different roads. It's extremely difficult to reconcile a situation where one of you wants to go down a certain road and the other can't do it without sacrificing a large part of who they are.

I wish I could give you the words to save everything and make it all how it was years ago, but I can't. All I can tell you is that if it ends and you think, "I could have loved her better. I could have done more," then you'll have a hard time coming to grips with that, maybe forever. But if you've been all you can be, then there are no regrets. Disappointments, yes. Regrets, no. Your road does not - and will not - end. If you can move, you can continue to grow.